Being given the assignment to interview Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus felt like a premise for a Hallmark Channel Christmas movie.

While I walked away from this story with a rekindled holiday spirit and goodwill to all, I did so without meeting a new love interest, which is fitting perhaps since we are bound by reality and not Hallmark’s fantasy.

I quickly realized that Santa and I share some similar job duties. After all, what is a local newspaper but both the first draft of history and a copy of the Naughty or Nice list?

“It wasn’t easy to get Santa to arrive, considering how in demand he is,” Sedona Heritage Museum Executive Director Nate Meyers said. “But we promised great treats and lots of good music. And he decided that the weather looked a lot nicer than what it’ll be in the North Pole today.”

I met Santa and Mrs. Claus at the SHM’s “Merry Music at the Museum” program on Saturday, Dec. 14. Between the typical requests for toy trains, the two had made a stop earlier in the day in at the Cottonwood Recreation Center for “Breakfast and Photos with Santa.”

The couple asked what I wanted for Christmas as well, so I initially asked for a new leather jacket.The Clauses gave me no cause for alarm for local residents; Santa said the children in Sedona and Cottonwood are all on the nice list.

“It’s got to be how pretty it is here,” Santa said.

“We still have the same reindeer but they’re getting old like me,” Santa said. “But as long as the elves keep that magic potion going, they fly like the wind.”

Santa added that self-care is critical to keeping the magic going and spreading the cheer year after year. His preparation for the big night involves “lots of cookies and lots of sleep,” and he eschews protein shakes in his training regimen. “It’s the dietary shakes that I get because I start putting on too much weight, and Mrs. Claus cuts me off, so I fit in my [uniform].”

“Although he loves a cup of hot chocolate at night, especially at this time of the year,” Mrs. Claus commented.

“Nice music, nice views and having Mrs. Claus next to me,” was what Santa said keeps him going. He especially looks forward to listening to KAHM 102.1FM when he is flying his sleigh over Yavapai County.

When asked if more multi-family housing would make his job easier, Santa responded that it would confuse his process, as he prefers to continue his traditional delivery approach. But, he said, he is constantly evolving both on a personal and professional level.

“Mrs. Claus helps me groom my hair and beard,” Santa said. “The elves used to do it and the elves are getting a little bit more modern, so I’ve occasionally ended up with green and orange and purple hair.”

Santa also announced a potential update to his energy policy in that he is looking into transitioning away from giving fossil fuels to those on the naughty list.

“Sometimes he lets the naughty children rake up the reindeer poo and they clean out the stalls,” Mrs. Claus said.

“All of us are naughty at one time or another,” Santa said. ”[But] when we make up for what we’ve done, or when we apologize or when we do something kind, it takes us off the naughty list. So it’s hard to stay on the naughty list.”

“Matter of fact, I’m not above that, either,” Santa said, revealing that he has been known to get upset if he drops some gifts. “I always seem to lose my grip on items made in China.”

Santa also offered a solution to our agathokakological existence from a recent conversation with a Verde Valley child.

“I’ve had a couple of unusual requests this year,” Santa said. “I just asked one child, ‘What do you want for Christmas?’ ‘I just want my friend to be happy,’ they told me … I asked them, ‘Do you love her?’ They said ‘Yes.’ And I responded, ‘Well, love her more and she will be happier.’”